28 December, 2006
I woke up at the strange and unholy hour of 4 in the morning, and little did I know that the action was about to begin, and for good reason, becuase the world shouldn't function at that hour. I found it hard at first to remember where I was or what I was doing, but soon the realization sunk in; I was about to embark on an epic journey to the farthest of the 50 states, Hawaii.
We drove to the airport in what can only be called a fashion of extreme fatigue sprinkled with the anxiety of going to the distant land that we were all longing for. The airport security was curtious, and very thorough. Once we were on the plane, I wondered what sort of demon would create a large aluminum can with wings, and I questioned the very fact that the beast could even fly. True, I had seen these things in the air before, but I've been fooled in the past. But to my chagrin, the plane indeed did fly, unless it was some sort of ornate conspiracy and I was really drugged and merely taken to Wyoming, becuase let's face it, have you ever really met someone who was from Wyoming? And if you have, I think you are being lied to.
Well, regardless of whether you've been duped into this strange web of lies or not, the fact of the matter is that we made it to Hawaii (or possibly Wyoming, I'll have to look into that at a later date). When we arrived, I was shocked at how mild the climate was, in fact, the airport didn't even have windows sheilding them from the elements. Perhaps this was done on purpose, but then again, as Roger Jones so poignently put it, we were in a third world country. Perhaps they could not afford windows, but then again, once one sees what the price for sliced government cheese is here, you know they've got money somewheres.
We checked into the fabulous Wakiki Gateway Hotel, which was smack dab in the heart of the tourist sector. We were given the rest of the day off, so indeed we had to go and check out the water. Just as I had expected, it was indeed water, and it was wet. The group, which we began to collectively call the TP5 (it would later become 6, but that is for a later entry), began to embark on a grueling hike through the wastelands of the beach, which was littered with scantily clad women and men who should have been wearing much more than they were. We reached an area of the beach where civilization again appeared, but whether it ever disapeared was a mystery for only the like of Scooby Doo and the Mystery Crew.
We decided that now was the time to head back to hotel, since darkness was coming, and that was when the strange and unnatural street performers came out. We must have walked for something near 1,000 miles, or possibly only 3, until we stumbled back upon the hotel. Along the way we saw many things that man was just not meant to see, like a vagrant praying to a No Smoking sign. To this day I am still haunted by the memory of this fell beast.
Once we returned to the hotel, we took a rest, and then decided that we needed something to eat. We walked in search of this food court in a mall that a local had told us about, but we quickly became disorientated by the multitude of flashing lights and people who spoke a myriad of different languages. We decided to eat a Chinese Buffet, and though I thought it was enjoyable, several of the guys did not agree with the food and they later prayed to the porcelin gods in the wee hours of the morning. The next day was to be the first in our official class lectures, so we went to bed after experiencing the local legend known as a Mai-Tai, and had dreams filled of flying electric snakes, and mean chinese cooks throwing cleavers at our feet.
I woke up at the strange and unholy hour of 4 in the morning, and little did I know that the action was about to begin, and for good reason, becuase the world shouldn't function at that hour. I found it hard at first to remember where I was or what I was doing, but soon the realization sunk in; I was about to embark on an epic journey to the farthest of the 50 states, Hawaii.
We drove to the airport in what can only be called a fashion of extreme fatigue sprinkled with the anxiety of going to the distant land that we were all longing for. The airport security was curtious, and very thorough. Once we were on the plane, I wondered what sort of demon would create a large aluminum can with wings, and I questioned the very fact that the beast could even fly. True, I had seen these things in the air before, but I've been fooled in the past. But to my chagrin, the plane indeed did fly, unless it was some sort of ornate conspiracy and I was really drugged and merely taken to Wyoming, becuase let's face it, have you ever really met someone who was from Wyoming? And if you have, I think you are being lied to.
Well, regardless of whether you've been duped into this strange web of lies or not, the fact of the matter is that we made it to Hawaii (or possibly Wyoming, I'll have to look into that at a later date). When we arrived, I was shocked at how mild the climate was, in fact, the airport didn't even have windows sheilding them from the elements. Perhaps this was done on purpose, but then again, as Roger Jones so poignently put it, we were in a third world country. Perhaps they could not afford windows, but then again, once one sees what the price for sliced government cheese is here, you know they've got money somewheres.
We checked into the fabulous Wakiki Gateway Hotel, which was smack dab in the heart of the tourist sector. We were given the rest of the day off, so indeed we had to go and check out the water. Just as I had expected, it was indeed water, and it was wet. The group, which we began to collectively call the TP5 (it would later become 6, but that is for a later entry), began to embark on a grueling hike through the wastelands of the beach, which was littered with scantily clad women and men who should have been wearing much more than they were. We reached an area of the beach where civilization again appeared, but whether it ever disapeared was a mystery for only the like of Scooby Doo and the Mystery Crew.
We decided that now was the time to head back to hotel, since darkness was coming, and that was when the strange and unnatural street performers came out. We must have walked for something near 1,000 miles, or possibly only 3, until we stumbled back upon the hotel. Along the way we saw many things that man was just not meant to see, like a vagrant praying to a No Smoking sign. To this day I am still haunted by the memory of this fell beast.
Once we returned to the hotel, we took a rest, and then decided that we needed something to eat. We walked in search of this food court in a mall that a local had told us about, but we quickly became disorientated by the multitude of flashing lights and people who spoke a myriad of different languages. We decided to eat a Chinese Buffet, and though I thought it was enjoyable, several of the guys did not agree with the food and they later prayed to the porcelin gods in the wee hours of the morning. The next day was to be the first in our official class lectures, so we went to bed after experiencing the local legend known as a Mai-Tai, and had dreams filled of flying electric snakes, and mean chinese cooks throwing cleavers at our feet.
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